Control Issues?

Have you ever known something about yourself deep down but refused to admit it to the full extent? Only then you are startled by a loud wake up call coming to you from left field? Oh, ya? Me too. I have come to realize something I've always known about myself, I am a control freak. I am happy to say I also know I'm not one of those super controlling types who will try to beat my husband into submission, starve myself like an anorexic, or run my home like a military base. I just like schedules, order, and things to go according to plan. I dislike spontaneity to an extent. Let's go to dinner? Sure. Let's go swimming? No! I have to plan for swimming the day ahead. Owen needs to take an early nap. I need to shave. I need to have planned for food and packed accordingly. Yup, I am a control freak. Is this a problem for me? Not really. In fact it helps keep my life on track. And I don't think Josh or the kids mind it either. They know Mom will shop for them, have food on the table, clean clothing to wear, get them to extracurricular practices on time, and have a generally clean home. They also know what is expected of them (chores, homework) which takes the hassle out of yelling every morning, "GET UP NOW! AND MAKE YOUR BED! DID YOU BRUSH YOUR TEETH?" Okay, sometimes our mornings still sound similar to the aforementioned yelling. So really, is being a control freak all that bad?

Meet Haylie Jo. Free spirited, quirky, stubborn, do her own thing, Haylie Jo. That girl was born with a mind of her own and does not bend her will for anyone. Does that mean she talks back to her teacher or doesn't ever listen to me? No. In fact, she is super level headed. She doesn't let other's emotions determine her mood. Jozlyn may be irritable, even towards Haylie, and she just lets it go. But there are times when you want her to do something and she will absolutely not listen. I've learned to pick my battles. Fine you want to wear the hood of your coat on all the time, regardless if it's raining or not (a pet peeve of mine), go right ahead. You want to watch TV instead of doing your homework, um no. Well, this little stubborn girl has taken to starving herself. Yup, that's right. Starving herself. You would never know it by the looks of her, she looks downright healthy. How did this start?

A year ago I had Owen, quit my job, and became a SAHM. I committed to making all meals, and specifically, dinner every night. AND I DID IT! It has felt like such an accomplishment for me. My mom never taught me to cook, and then I was in college and working and I never had time to teach myself. I would make spaghetti, a roast, grilled cheese sandwiches, and McDonald's would make us chicken nuggets and hamburgers. Yes, we ate out more than I'd like to admit. I knew how unhealthy it was for us but seriously, I was busy. So, I began finding new recipes, teaching myself to cook, meal planning, and making some super yummy food. Only, Haylie Jo liked McDonald's chicken nuggets, not the homemade chicken nugget recipe I found on allrecipes that had over 1000 5 star reviews. Thus began our dinnertime struggle. I would make something, Haylie would refuse to eat it, Haylie would wake up in the morning doubled over in pain from hunger. Yes, it was that bad. So after a few times of that Josh and I decided if she didn't eat dinner, she could eat a few healthy snacks before bed like a banana or string cheese. I mentioned this to her pediatrician who set us up an appointment to see a dietician, which we did yesterday....